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| This was not now , not now , not now anymore. Rainbow always round with sun? Then how only can be sun? |
Finally , no work no hang out.
Finally , I can stay home for a day.
How long I been longing this wonderful day.
How long I'm not stay at home.
Since the coming of SPM , my form 5 life.
Running all the way round to Pudu.
My afternoon , tuition had finished.
When the day was no tuition , I slept.
I slept soundly in the afternoon.
The large hot dazzling fireball made me don't want to open eyes.
Then the night I was mostly active.
Busy revision , busy thinking , busy gossip , busy planing , busy finding. Busy Busy Busy.
Making me don't want to sleep.
Worrying tomorrow test , tomorrow time's limit , tomorrow homework , tomorrow nearer to SPM.
OH MY.
What happen to me?
Before that I was keep counting the days , said in deep heart , faster end please.
I wan get my life back.
Everyday night I'm praying this , I'm saying this to myself.
But now , it already became a past tense for me.
But , I had used to it.
I want study , I want work hard.
This appeared in my mind , always.
Since those days were past , I join myself to the part time work.
Since those days became a past , I'm keeping counting on it , I'm really miss it.
I'm recalling those nice past days.
I said it was really wonderful but I found no wonderful when that.
Soon , I may step back in my secondary school for form 6?
Or , HELP CAT for psychology?
Or , other college?
I don't know how should I continue to step forward.
Too many question marks , unknown , choices.
Waiting me to reveal step by step.
I missed those days.
I'm growing up , I'm observe the far far way.
Now , here was a big hot afternoon.
I'm longing to go out for a run , for a walk , for a breath.
My days was breathless. WORKING WORKING.
NO MORE.
I'm longing for a work out , for a gym , for a training.
I store too much FATS in my body.
That's was super ugly.
No matter how expensive the cloth I wear , it still UGLY.
It still became CHEAP!
I'm longing for a silence , I'm longing for a space of mind , I'm longing to lie on the grassland.
Seeing the sky , Seeing the cloud , Seeing the bright hot sun , seeing the aeroplane and making my childhood dream , and recalling my childhood.
I'm counting my past.
MINE PAST.
Now , here , I'm enjoying this afternoon.
The sparrow fly quickly everywhere , all around.
The annoying dark crow fly messy all around near the big dustbin.
Scattered the rubbish all around , making flies , making trouble , making smelly , making unhygienic , attract the nearby stray dogs come around , find for food.
Luckily , I cant see this view from my house.
The banana trees was perfect to be here.
The parallel leaves of it reflex the sunlight evenly to the whole view , making it more brightly , and more animate.
The wind softly run through , the bright green leaves sway gently.
I lay down my burden , for a while.
As long as this wonderful afternoon.
The piano music reel around my ears.
It was classic piano music from Richard Clayderman.
A very first pianist I know , and I like.
Emm.
I seems like still not satisfy with it?
YES.
Take a deep deep breath.
Lay down my eyelids.
This is what I'm really longing for.
The peace and the silence of heart.
At least nobody there knocking , At least nobody there disturbing , At least nobody there annoying , at least nobody there.
At least At least............
Yesterday , can I?
Please?
Boredom of everything , priceless.
Boredom of person. Who always noise nothing there.
Who always done for nothing.
Who always saying others , who always free , who always DON'T KNOW life.
Who always waiting for the Satan.
I hate them , from my deep heart.
I hate myself , for the limit capable.
I hate , but do I care so?
Ops , Please , Don't ruined my wonderful afternoon.
Good afternoon! =)
Shhhh....
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